Keen for normality

I’m really keen to get back into the normal grind of life. These past months have been too much of a rollercoaster for me. I feel exhausted and feel close to a burn out, which is why my boss has been so compassionate and suggested I stick to working half days this past week and the coming week at least. I hope that will help me get back on track somewhat.

Yesterday we buried our dear family friend who only got to be 47 years old. We lost her far too soon, it’s been heartbreaking. Junior came over from Portugal for the funeral, he was here for 36 hours. My kids loved her like she was family, as did we. Now that my friend has lost her younger sister, she and her aunt have absolutely no other family left, so we’ll try to be family for her as much as we can be.

Yesterday Mr E and I also had our 32nd anniversary of getting together, which was completely lost in the sadness of the day. Today I found a 2009 picture of us on Junior’s old Nintendo DSi game console (which mini me asked me to restore to former playing glory and, after a lot of effort, I managed to do!). I guess I’ll celebrate our anniversary belatedly with that today…

Anyway, I hope that for now all new drama and heartache is over – I still have more than enough left over to deal with! I need positivity and calm but we’ll see how that goes with our move coming up. Moving boxes have been delivered and I guess it’s time to start packing. We have some time yet but there’s so much to go through, it makes sense to try and start early.

We have extra things to pack too as last week the family all met up at my mother’s flat and we divided all sorts of items between us. It all happened in great harmony, I’m so proud of us as a family. I inherited a lovely antique framed print and a row of small books which includes a 1919 edition of Othello, an 18th century Koran and a Roman History book from the early 17th century. I took those home with me…

… but other items will stay at my mother’s flat until after we move, so we don’t have to move things twice.

I hate packing but it’s a good time to go through all of our stuff and decide what really needs to be kept and what can go. I’m feeling completely exhausted today and have done very little so far. For today, tackling my DVD collection is the aim. I have most of these in digital form, so a lot of the physical form will go.

Here’s to normal life resuming again soon, albeit it with great holes in my heart for the people I’m missing. Today in the forefront, next to my mother and our friend, it’s also my dad I’m thinking of who would have turned 90 today.

I think I need to go in search of chocolate…

Another goodbye

One of our oldest and closest friends (my staying-up-for-the-Oscars-all-through-the-night buddy) lost her younger sister today at the age of only 47. Her sister was also like a sister to us and she was like an aunt to our children. Besides her wicked humor and all the laughter and love, one of my most cherished memories is the holiday to Israel she and her sister shared with us ten years ago.

We are heartbroken over the loss of her. Rest in peace, dear friend.

A little Christmas outing

For many years now Mr Esther, I, and two university friends of ours have been going to Christmas markets in Germany in the month of December. Last year was supposed to be our 25th going-to-a-Christmas-market anniversary and we had wanted to go big to celebrate. We were planning on going to Berlin and make a nice 3 or 4 day trip of it but then the Corona virus happened last year and we couldn’t go. Instead, we were going to meet up, socially distanced, at our one friend’s house but then our other friend canceled the day before because she was feeling feverish. Good thing she did that too as she had indeed contracted Covid! Luckily she and her whole family had mild cases. So, no Christmas market or even getting together last year. I did have special Christmas market mugs made, to compensate a little for that loss.

We had wanted to try a Christmas market again this year but alas, with the new Omicron variant that was impossible as well. I think many markets in Germany have been canceled and even if they are open, we didn’t want to risk going to one and finding it to be too crowded. Our friend suggested we go to a sand sculpture festival in the east of the country. Attached to that was a little Christmas market of sorts and you could only get in with timed tickets, so hopefully a guarantee that it would never get too crowded. Armed with masks and proof of vaccination we went there last Saturday and it was great!

The sand sculptures have been up for quite a while (since last year, no new theme this year because of the pandemic) and the theme was “World War II and 75 years liberation”. They were stunning! Everything was covered from soldiers fighting, to daily life, to concentration camps, to battles such as Pearl Harbour, to liberation, our Dutch royal family, Anne Frank, Marlene Dietrich, Eleanor Roosevelt and the Universal Declaration of Human Rights. I took loads of pictures and have to share some here (click on images to see a larger view).

It was truly fascinating and to think that everything was made out of sand! We were really impressed.

There was a quaint shop and a little market around there that we walked through. I especially loved a treehouse they had made there. More pictures…

Afterwards we drove to this little restaurant in the middle of nowhere that Mr E remembered from some years back (again, only to be entered with proof of vaccination and assurance none of us had a cold). We had some hot chocolate and apple pie there. It was a foggy day and it all looked quite magical. Even the trees through the raindrops on our car’s sunroof looked magical….

We’re in another lockdown here, so all restaurants close at 5 pm. We left a little before that and drove to our friend’s house where we ordered in delicious sushi. When we got home again, Mr E set up the bust of a young lady in our garden that we had bought at the little market. She’s looking lovely today.

I’m glad we were able to do something nice like this while also keeping to regulations and I really hope that next year we can finally take that Berlin trip.

Socializing again

We had our first post-lockdown house guest: my 21 year old niece came to stay with us from abroad for 5 days, negative Covid tested and half-vaccinated (getting her second shot soon). She met up with some Dutch friends and of course came to see the family. It was good to reconnect again, especially for the cousins. My niece is studying at a university in South Korea and my daughter is already planning her trip to visit her there after she graduates high school next year.

After I dropped my niece off at the airport to fly home to my brother (her dad) yesterday morning, I drove to Delft to have my first post-lockdown lunch with two friends of mine. We hadn’t seen each other in over a year. No kisses and hugs hello, because you never know with high Covid infection numbers now, but a lovely outdoor lunch and time to catch up again in person.

A week and a half ago I also met up outdoors and socially distanced with 12 or 13 colleagues of mine for late afternoon drinks before the summer holidays start and next week I have a dinner planned with 3 ex-colleagues who have become friends. Although everything is happening with some distancing (except my niece’s visit), it feels like social life is picking up again. It’s lovely but also feels a little weird and I find I need a little time to adjust. Have I become even more introverted since the lockdowns started last year March? I find that while I’m really happy to see people again, I’m also really happy to come back home and crawl back into my own world again.

After I finish this post, I’m off to do some grocery shopping and then I think I’ll put the laptop away for a change and start crawling back into books again. Actor D.B. Woodside posted this on his Instagram stories…

…. and I’m thinking, yes, reading is a great idea! We have tried to make our kids read in the past as well but alas, it didn’t stick and they are not great readers now. Even I, who used to be a great reader when I was younger (before kids), have been neglecting my reading for quite a while now. Seeing D.B.’s daughter like that reminds me of my own childhood reading days and how I loved reading then and now I really want to disappear into a book again. Counterbalancing the socializing with reading seems like a great idea, no?

Rest in peace, old friend

My 83 year old aunt, who we all love dearly, had a very close friend, her closest friend for about 45 years, a sort of partner for her. As such we as a family became close to my aunt’s friend as well. Last night, at the age of 95, the friend died in a nursing home. Due to the Corona crisis my aunt had not been able to see her for close to two months, which was very difficult in itself, especially considering that before that my aunt had visited her almost daily.

H had not been well for a while and became completely bed ridden some 3 or 4 werks ago (not Corona related). Yesterday my aunt was able to say her goodbyes and in the night, at around 3 am this morning, H peacefully passed away in her sleep. She has had a good life.

I will always remember H’s tenaciousness of spirit and especially her huge sense of humour. Rest in peace, old friend.