First dance

One more diary entry to share, this time not about first love but about the love of my life to whom I am now married. A few years ago I blogged about how Mr Esther and I got together, our first kiss happpened on the morning after a long date night. Before that first kiss there was also a first slow dance. Yet again, this is another memory triggered by Anne with an E (obsessed much? Nah! 😉 ) The memory was already triggered a few weeks ago, during episode 5, when Anne and Gilbert first danced. (Beware of spoilers ahead in the videos).

If you care to see the whole dance scene, it can be seen in this video. I promise you, the scene is magical.

What happens is that Anne and Gilbert dance and at some point they forget the world around them and become completely engrossed in each other, with the music fading away and the couple dancing in slow motion. And I swear that such a moment can happen as well in real life! It happened when Mr Esther and I first danced. We’d been dancing the night away at a disco and in the early hours of morning, close to closing time, the music slowed down and we finally slow danced together for the first time. Our dance was nothing like the choreographed Anne and Gilbert dance. We both aren’t great dancers, we just slow-dance-shuffled. I wrote about it in my diary that same evening on Sunday, January 26th, 1992:

” I’ll never forget the last two numbers, they were slow dance songs. Somehow we landed in each other’s arms. I don’t remember anything of the first song, just that it was slow and that we were holding each other very close and tight. I had my head against his shoulder, he had his chin on my head or to the side of my face most of the time.  We hardly moved, just swayed along with the music. I’ll never forget what went through me. I completely sank against his body and allowed us to go cheek to cheek occasionally. Occasionally we said something but mostly I savoured the moments with my eyes closed. The second song was Chris Isaac’s “ Wicked Game”. I’ll never forget that I couldn’t hold him close enough. I loved him so much as we danced. He was holding me tight too. Then the lights went on and the time had come to close up the place. We sat down and talked and at about 5 a.m. we left.”

To this day, neither of us can remember what that first song was that we slow danced to. We were so engrossed in each other and in how much we were feeling, that the world around us completely disappeared. I still remember the sensations, the wonder of finally being in his arms, feeling his head on my mine, feeling his cheek against mine, rarely daring to really look at each other but still being very close and feeling all these feelings… It felt momentous and the memory still warms my heart today, close to 28 years later. I had never felt something like that before and the world has never quite disappeared around me again like that since. It really was a once in a lifetime feeling. By the second slow dance song, the music finally filtered through to us again. We neither of us particularly love that Chris Isaac song and yet that song will always be special to me.

After that Anne with an E episode aired, I was in full on video-making mode and I wanted to make a video about that dance scene. With all these memories unleashed of my first dance with Mr Esther, guess which song I chose for that fan video? Yep, that’s right: “Wicked Game”, only I chose a cover version instead of the Chris Isaac version.

We are gearing up to the final season 3 Anne with an E episode this coming Sunday. The past episode showed Gilbert remembering his dance with Anne again…

… and I can so understand how even only remembering it can stop your heart there for a few moments! It triggered my happy first dance memory again as well and is also the reason for this post. 🙂

Moira Walley-Beckett, who writes and produces Anne, just posted this behind-the-scenes picture on her Instagram account from an iconic after-the-dance scene, only this picture is far less angsty than the actual scene was:

Anne Gilbert Moira after dance BTS

Anyway, with this season nearing it’s end, I know I will miss it so much! There is no confirmation yet whether there will be a season 4 but with all I have in me, I so hope that Anne with an E will be renewed!  Where do I have to send my letter? And hey, if I can help with crowdfunding or something, I am so there… In the meantime, I guess I will just have to console myself with more fan videos.

17 thoughts on “First dance

  1. Esther again thank you for this beautiful heart felt and so romantic post! I feel I was a fly on the wall there!
    What an incredible feeling and to relive it through Anne with a E is just lovely!
    Once I watch all three seasons I’ll run to watch your videos! 😘❤️

    Liked by 1 person

      1. I love how you told it almost through the eyes of Anne and Gilbert ! And how you set the scene of these slow dances with your two other diary posts. Just fabulous and to borrow Rachel’s word lush ! I’ve re read these three posts now to perk up and as inspiration for me!!😂❤️👏

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Aw, sweet of you to think of me!
          I was a bit iffy about this movie going in. I love Emma Thompson but I’d read mixed reviews and Rolling Stone magazine gave it one star! As much as I like watching Hallmark movies, they are also feel good throw away movies and I was hoping for something more from this movie. Also, I’ve never been a huge George Michael / Wham fan. So, I went in with expectations not too high but found I enjoyed this movie more than I expected! I like Emilia Clarke well enough, I really like Henry Golding (loved him in Crazy Rich Asians). I don’t want to spoil anything here about the ‘mystery’ that’s revealed in the movie but the mystery reveal wasn’t a huge surprise to me. It’s the reason why these two are connected and that bit I did find iffy. It was also iffy how quickly everything turned around for her. But it’s a fairytale kinda movie and I’m OK with suspending belief in such a case. What I did like was that it was more a story about finding joy in life than a love story. There were some nice laughs and smiles and I loved the warmth of this… and I loved Henry Golding. End verdict: not a classic or a particular favourite but I did enjoy it and will probably end up watching (bits of it) again.
          Now you, what did you think?

          Liked by 2 people

  2. Servetus

    Good point about it being more than a love story. And I enjoy Henry Golding, too (like him in “A Simple Favor” as well). Also, like you, I was unsurprised about the “mystery.” I was somewhat amused by the romance between the shop owner and the sauerkraut expert.

    I’d have given it one star, though, just like Rolling Stone (I’ll have to check out that review). I found Emma Thompson’s performance embarrassing, to be frank, and it was puzzling to me how someone who appears as up to date as she does in other regards (for example, what she’s said about #metoo) could be in a film with that many dated ethnic stereotypes and then choose to embody one herself. What was she thinking? I found nothing to like about Emilia Clark’s character, particularly after one of the scenes at her mother’s table when her sister was there, so I found i didn’t really believe in her redemption(s), or care at all about what happened to her in the film.

    I’ve been trying to expand my tastes (given that the films I really want to see are often not shown at the cinema here), but this wasn’t it. I did see a trailer for a romance that I’d consider seeing (“The Photograph”), though, so there’s that.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Here’s the Rolling Stone review although by no means I thought it as bad as they did:

      Yeah, I had the same twinges with Emma Thompson’s stereotype as well but it was more of a spoof to me than anything realistic, so I could deal with it. I found the Santa lovestory amusing in an over-the-top sort of way. And Emilia Clarke does have an engaging quality, I find. Her eyebrows do interesting work and I like her smile, so she never bothered me. It I took the movie as a serious movie then yeah, it wouldn’t have been great. But I saw it more as a spoofy (though not laugh out loud funny) fairytale kinda movie, which to me was fun and entertaining enough.


      1. Servetus

        Clarke — it’s not how she looks, it’s how she acts. She just goes from carelessly mean thing to carelessly mean thing all the way through (with the low point at that dinner party), and the subplot at the homeless shelter doesn’t make it up for me, as it’s just another way for her to garner attention. The mother / daughter relationship as shown in the film was also bordering on offensive. I just really disliked the character and was horrified by her most of the time. An interesting face doesn’t make up for that in my book.

        But I think your larger point is a more interesting one: what is funny? I knew this was supposed to be a comedy going in, but I just really found very little about it amusing. I am losing patience for this traditional kind of humor. Things that are supposed to be amusing (Santa changing her name in every job she has because no one can pronounce her name) just don’t amuse me any more. That issues rubs me wrong specifically because it’s a situation I face increasingly at work myself. The character narrates ongoing attempts to deal with the world’s ethnocentrism / racism / oppression and I as a white woman am supposed to laugh at it? And why is Emilia Clark’s character laughing at it? I feel like it’s a joke from 1963, and I just can’t go there any more. This is not to criticize you or anyone who found the movie funny — I just feel like it’s a worn out trope, and in general, that the movie itself was filled with wornout tropes that aren’t funny in 2019.

        My niece loved it, though. So you’re clearly not alone 🙂


        1. I never found the film really funny, just amusing. Yeah, I get where you’re coming from.
          I liked it, my friend who I went with liked it, my sister who usually likes films like these absolutely didn’t like it… A film that divides opinion, apparently.

          Liked by 1 person

              1. Servetus

                Let me know if I ever annoy you with all these bulletins — I am a pathological information sharer and happy to be told “it’s enough already!”

                Liked by 1 person

              2. Nope, it’s all good! Rather like the thought that people think of me with certain topics and want to share what they come across. Doesn’t mean I’ll necessarily read everything but I like it. 🙂

                Liked by 1 person

  3. Pingback: A year ago… – The Book of Esther

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